Child Anxiety

What is it about a child that makes a parent anxious?

Is it a deeply egotistical need to convince ourselves that we have done everything right when it comes to raising them? Is it an evolutionary adaptation that requires us to protect our young from harm so that our species will continue?

I think for me it is a desire to keep my children from experiencing any of the pain that I have experienced in my life. I look at my son as he embarks on marriage and I worry that he will make the same mistakes I made and will experience the deep sorrow that I  have experienced. When I start thinking that way, I remind myself that along with the deep sorrow I experienced, I also experienced deep joy, not the least of which was the birth of this son (and his siblings). It is hard though.

I find myself holding back when I hear him express exasperation about this or that decision. I want to suggest that he solve it this way or that. But that cannot be right. We each make choices, some good, some not so good. We learn through our mistakes. He will have to do that, just as I did.

It's a funny thing about age. It is not possible to put the young into your "old" shoes and make them see life from your perspective, but then I do not want him to live my life. I want him to live his life.

Marriage is full of joys and sorrows. We want our children to experience the joys of marriage, and to avoid the sorrows of marriage. I know that I cannot have it both ways. I guess this must be where faith comes in. I must have faith that all will go well. I must have faith in my child that he will make the right choices.

For parents, life is full of child anxiety. I am learning.